This is Life!

I think we are moving very far away from expression of feelings! Most people tend to think just too much before expressing themselves. In this world full of artificial things the originals are getting lost day by day.

Look at a child's laughter - and you will see that it's straight from the heart and you can almost sense the happiness the child feels at that moment. The same goes for crying.

Look at us adults.. even if we want to laugh our hearts out at times - we don't. Anybody who does laugh aloud and openly is considered abnormal. If one cries openly (s)he's considered overtly sensitive and emotional. All these judgments stop people from behaving naturally and it is becoming so difficult expressing feelings. Private feelings like love are one of the few that yet survive and I hope that at least people haven't put a ration on expressing their love as yet. However hatred is one interesting feeling which people don't hide much. They go out of their way to show it :-)

As a mother I see.. how we adults are responsible for putting these so called sophisticated and artificial habits in our children. These days when Ashna laughs - it's like a big uproar - she laughs really loud.. her eyes her voice her entire body language is like full of that happiness! But soon poor soul gets a string of advices.. Ashna please laugh softly.. you don't have to jump when you are laughing and so on.. I'd rather let her do it now cos something or someone or the other will force her to change what I call a perfectly natural, normal and so full of expression behaviour.

It's such a big irony that people restrict their laughter all their life, and when they grow old they join laughter clubs to laugh the way they stopped their child from laughing.

Part of my weekend was without Ashna since she was off to naani's place - and it was not that bad afterall... :-) Checked out a new mall and blew away some money on clothes after quite some time.

Talking about music - i find it hard to sit in office without my headphones these days and have been listening to indian classical after being away from it for so long now. Listening to various instruments - but what's touching me most these days is listening to the tabala.. The beats .. the melody.. and listening to teen taal and rupak loud in my ears is just too good. Wonder why it didn't sound this melodious when it was being played in class.. or maybe then we used to be too busy in correcting our own swars - some things take their time to touch your hearts I guess. And now as I listen to these I remember how the meghalaya tabla master "Dango Sir" who came to our class played the tabala with so much intensity and charm!

What's your favourite music instrument?

Trust is the first step to love.
- Munshi Premchand

There is a wonderful mythical law of nature that the three things we crave most in life - happiness, freedom and peace of mind - are always attained by giving them to someone else.

small sweet things - may sound very insignificant to the world - but they mean the world for me. I cried struggled and questioned why these sweet absolutely normal things could not be a part of my life. Just when I had begun to accept it all and take life as it comes.. these have now begun happening. I'm mesmerised with the beginnings and I wish it never ends.

I guess I'm being more appreciative, cos these things didn't come in a platter for me in the first place. I guess that's what we all do - take most things for granted?

Are you proud to follow traffic rules....?

are today's kids just smart or are they just "we-will-do-what-we-want" kinds or both?!

We are through this phase where we are training Ashna to eat her meal fully on her own, which like is 80% success so far since long - i.e the last 20% of food we got to feed her - she won't have on her own. To proceed further yesterday I had to make it incentive based - since she loves to eat something sweet after her meal, I put a condition that if she eats fully by herself she can have the sweets - else she can't. So principally she agreed - but realized that she won't get the sweet after the current meal cos I helped her finish it. Then she did something unusual... the sweet box is usually over the refrigerator which she can't reach normally. So usually I get it down for her and also distribute to everybody else. But yesterday - she did my job.. very cool - she took a chair climbed up and got the box down - distributed swetts to everybody and took it herself too - as if nothing happened and there wasn't any condition attached to this. She just royally ignored me! Yesterday I didn't feel like stopping her :-) but will have to...!

despite being born in this month - cos every year this time i'm shown in my consolidated annual tax calculation how much money went away this year which is always more than what i paid last year - however the infrstructure that we get from the govt after paying so much tax is yet far away from where it should be!

Huh! What a day today! I was indifferent/ rude to two "friends" (if they yet stay on as friends)
I don't understand how people can get mad at me for priorotizing my own life - c'mon how can they just forget that it's my life and I'm doing what i feel is right - if they would be on my priority list i would have involved them- if they aren't then shouldn't they just understand and stay out! I better be talking to people less today - donno when and who I will snap back at next!

i have now come to a full belief that my pie is just too accident prone. Small falls and she somehow manages to get big damages! 2 days back she fell down in the garden - just with somebody pushing her while playing and she had her forehead against a cemented corner - it resulted in a cut which had to be fixed with 3 stitches. This girl is just 4 and a half and has had 2 operations and has 14 stitches on her body already! Not too add the mental trauma that comes along with it - the last fracture took almost 6 months to recover!